5. Sunshine, Smiles, and Slavery Here's a headline you don't see every day of the week: "School defends slavery booklet." Apparently students at one of North Carolina's largest Christian schools are being forced to read a booklet which literally "whitewashes" slavery, suggesting that slaves led "a life of plenty, of simple pleasures."
Oh, for sure. You can bet that all those Africans loved being kidnapped from their homes and transported across the ocean to work without pay for their white masters. The backbreaking work; the dehumanization; the occasional flogging. Ah, the "simple pleasures" in life.
Incidentally, one of the authors of the booklet is a member of the board of directors of the League of the South, which is classified as a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center. And according to the News Observer, "Leaders at Cary Christian School say they are not condoning slavery by using 'Southern Slavery, As It Was,'" which apparently "attempts to provide a biblical justification for slavery and asserts that slaves weren't treated as badly as people think." No, they're not condoning it. Just, you know, pretending it didn't happen.
6. Rolling Back The Clock Moral Values Watch: David Brock's Media Matters for America had to send a letter to the Creators Syndicate last week after they distributed a column by Sam Francis about the recent Monday Night Football naughtiness. But wait - it's not what you think!
The naughtiness was, of course, a comedy skit performed at the beginning of Monday Night Football on November 26 by Nicolette Sheridan and Terrell Owens, in which Sheridan attempted to seduce Owens into ducking the game and shagging her instead. But while most conservatives have been kicking up a stink over the fact that - gasp - a woman's bare back was shown on national television after 9pm, Francis had a decidedly different take.
According to him, the purpose of the skit was to "hurl a pie in the face of morals and good taste but also of white racial and cultural identity." Wait a second, white racial and cultural identity?
Francis continued, "Breaking down the sexual barriers between the races is a major weapon of cultural destruction because it means the dissolution of the cultural boundaries that define breeding and the family, and ultimately, the transmission and survival of the culture itself."
Jeez, guys, can you wait until we've sorted out the gay marriage thing before you start work on re-banning interracial dating?
Got read the whole top ten - last week was filled with idiots it looks like (why yes, George and Rummy are featured. How did you guess?
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- Teddy Roosevelt
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"Should any political party attempt to abolish social security, unemployment insurance, and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history. There is a tiny splinter group, of course, that believes you can do these things. Among them are [a] few other Texas oil millionaires, and an occasional politician or business man from other areas. Their number is negligible and they are stupid."
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